Athlete's Wives: Way Hotter Than Yours

Everybody’s friends at the Fanhouse have done a phenomenal job of compiling galleries of pictures of our favorite athletes (as well as golfers) and their wives. We at HeadBallCoach were inspired by their work and have taken on the difficult task of comparing these women based solely on their physical attributes. Because, really, that's all we care about.

Ladies (Are you lost?) and Gentlemen: The Hottest Wife Competition...

Football

Although the Barber twins are clearly affected by as what can only be described as “yellow fever,” our pick to represent the National Football League is Jeff Garcia’s wife, and former Playmate of the Year, Carmella Decesare. If you need NSFW convincing, simply do a Google Image search on her . Sweet Baby Jesus.

Baseball

Maybe Fanhouse just doesn’t have that many pics of baseball players’ wives. We hope that's the case, otherwise MLB players have absolutely no idea how to make use of their gigantic salaries. We went with Alicia Piazza simply because she looks like she WAS hot back when Mike still liked women. Derek Jeter deserves mention both for crushing more ass than we even have room to discuss, and not being tied down to just one piece of meat woman.

Basketball

We are sick and tired of seeing Eva Longoria on the San Antonio sidelines so we went with the sleeper pick of this competition, KG’s wife Brandi Garnett.

Golf

And finally, in an attempt to further confuse his children’s gene pool, Tiger Woods took a Swedish model as his wife. She gets extra points for having a twin sister.

WINNER: If you're still reading this, you're probably only scrolling with one hand, and I hope it's not because of Mike Piazza. Carmella Decesare by a country mile.

However, twins hold a special place in our pants hearts, and Elin Woods takes the gold if she brings her sister into the mix.

Read more after the jump...

1 Hog + 1 Lion + 1 Angry Looking Bird = Playoffs

This will be the year the Arizona Cardinals snap their nine year playoff drought.

Last year a leaky offensive line doomed Matt Leinart and the rest of the Cardinals' skill players. This year, there's a new sheriff in town, and he certainly looks ready to shoot a low budget porno.



No that's not Ron Jeremy on the set of '4th and 9 Inches,' it's Russ Grimm--the Cardinals new offensive line coach. An original member of the famed Redskins 'Hogs,' Grimm will know exactly how to utilize new draftee Levi Brown and former Buffalo Bill Mike Gandy to form a nasty, aggressive offensive line. While it won't evoke images of Grimm and his Hog-Mates steamrolling Miami in Super Bowl XVII, this improved Cardinals o-line will finally allow this talented Cardinal offense to shine.

Adding two Michigan alums (Go Blue!), Alan Branch and Stevie Breaston, through the draft should offer a substantial boost to the defense and special teams as well.

NFC West, you've been warned. Besides, Seahawks fans, are you really betting on this guy to win the division for you?


Read more after the jump...

"37 have tried, 37 have failed"

There are the words of Floyd Mayweather, Jr. at a press conference leading up to the biggest fight since Mike Tyson told us he would “just fade into Bolivian.” Here is our take:

De La Hoya

The biggest figure in boxing today when you consider the mom factor (My mom knows who he is…and thinks he’s handsome). No other fighter has such universal recognition as Oscar De La Hoya and if you think otherwise, picture in your mind what Wladomir Klitschko looks like…You thought of Ivan Drago, didn’t you?

Pros: Bigger, stronger, more experienced, sounds like Wilmer Valderrama

Cons: Slower, soft from fame and fortune, sounds like Wilmer Valderrama

Mayweather

The best pound-for-pound fighter in the game today (how many times have you heard that phrase since this fight was announced?). He is a voracious competitor that loves to fight and has the stamina of a 5 yr. old that just did lines of pixy stix. When you add in the drama surrounding his life, you have one of the most intriguing characters in the sport. Ever.

Pros: Faster, undefeated, younger, top of his game, regularly carries $30k in his pockets

Cons: Fighting up a weight class, less experienced, gambling habit likely to bankrupt him in the next 3 years

Head Ball Coach’s pick: Mayweather wins in a unanimous decision. We don't see him KO'ing the strong-chinned De La Hoya

....click clack

Read more after the jump...

I Hope Exerciser1211 is Mike's Brother

Mike Williams Auction

Considering the Raiders reportedly got Mike Williams for a year-old package of beef jerky (In Matt Millen's defense, it was BBQ), $49.95 seems a little steep, no?

However, it does seem somewhat prophetic that he wore #88, since he's one Shoney's buffet visit from switching to TE.
Read more after the jump...

The Beginning of an Era

We'll see how far this blog actually goes, but it will at the very least serve as another outlet for the greatest commercial of all time. David Ogilvy would have wept with pride if he created such a masterpiece.



Did they actually pay Spurrier for this? Or did they tell him they could take him back in time and give him another shot at evaluating his draft board for the Washington Redskins? I'm sure he was devastated when he was unable to draft Danny Wuerffel with the #6 overall pick.

Yeah.....click clack.
Read more after the jump...